The Day She Met Rizal:

Or how my Great-grandmother Taught me Magical Realism

‘Suberbia’ — a bastardization of the Spanish ‘subversivo’ or subversive. In the west or at least in its western connotation, when someone’s branded as subversive it denotes strong patriotism. The same value has pushed the individual to disobey authorities. Revolutionaries and heroes were once referred to as such prior to history honoring their acts. In the localized version, however, if someone is called ‘suberbia’ it usually has a negative implication, citing the person’s selfishness as opposed to its Western counterpart. Someone who insists on doing what they want. We could hear this word being used mostly as a reference to the elderly.

Culture perhaps has a role to play with the evolution of the word’s meaning. Particularly, the Filipino’s close-knitted relations, where we live in extended families and experiencing the boon and bane of living with the elderly members of our families. Aged care centers are not common in the Philippines. We consider it taboo even to send our aging relatives to the care of strangers. Whilst in other countries outside Asia, it is a billion-dollar industry. Filipinos including my sister are hired en masse to provide care and assistance to the elderly residents. In our society, usually, the siblings pool their finances to care for the grandmothers. Spinster children are usually given the task to care for their parents. Usually, the richer sibling sends money to finance. The most radical thing to do is to hire someone to be the caregiver.

Living with the elderly, one could end up using the word ‘suberbio’ or ‘suberbia’ when they are being stubborn. In my hometown, there’s an aged care house, referred to as ‘home for the aged’ or simply, ‘foundation’ in reference to the name of the institution. Among the elderly in my hometown, they tremble in fear or infuriate in pride when they’re told that they’ll be brought to the ‘foundation’ or the ‘home for the aged’ (emphasis on the ‘-ed’ in pronouncing). It’s used as a threat to the stubborn grandparent.

Now, here’s my great-grandmother. She lived for more years and finally, in her 90s, she was brought to a local medical center. She made it clear that she does not want to be transferred to the city. Yet the nurses insisted that she be brought to a bigger facility, knowing that if she resists it will be all futile she simply held her breath and expired. She had it her way. A true ‘Suberbia’ to the end.